Little kids have it easy when it comes to making friends. They have parents to manage their iCals and cafeterias to provide regular lunch dates.
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Sure, it’s all fun and games when there’s an adult wearing a whistle! But once jobs, unpredictable schedules, and our own management of them come into play, building a platonic adult friendship becomes as high-effort and potentially awkward as courting a romantic interest. You know what I mean: You’re at a party and are introduced to someone who coincidentally happens to have every-possible-thing in common with you, plus she has a rad haircut and laughs at all your jokes. Before the night ends, you’re scrambling like a 16-year old on prom night for reasons to stick around the punch bowl.
The questions you sift through when trying to become someone’s platonic best friend are not any different from the anxious questions of a smitten heart: Is it too soon to call her? What if she doesn’t think I’m as cool? Is it creepy to ‘like’ her last couple of status updates? You just want to shout (i.e. write in all caps on her wall), “I THINK YOU ARE AWESOME.” Only that’s weird. And if she’s seen Single White Female, it might actually be creepy.
I’ve made a fool out of myself more than once in this department. Forcing humor into untranslatable emails, making awkward suggestions of Facebook stalking, and familiarizing myself with their entire creative oeuvre before we’ve even had coffee – “Oh right, is this the same boyfriend you mention in your 2004 article on zebra fetishes?”. So when I say that it’s best to apply the same cool approach as you would to a potential bed buddy, you can trust I speak from experience.
