When I was young, I used to curl up in my mom’s closet (yes, I am aware of exactly how fitting that is) and read bible stories during nap time. I remember thinking that life would be absolutely perfect if I could just find a place that had fiberglass statue representations of these scenes so I could see just how slutty Jezebel really looked before she was thrown through that window. My dreams have finally come true with Tierra Santa, a bible-themed amusement park in Buenos Aires, Argentina. It has a 40 foot animatronic jesus statue that rises out of Golgotha once an hour, what more could you possibly want?
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Do you want to brush up on the old bible stories of your childhood? Tierra Santa made a theme park out of them. Are you itching to shovel food into your pie-hole next to mannequins dressed like the 12 apostles or whatever? You can partake in a recreation of the last supper.
Do you really want to visit Jerusalem, but also really want to go topless on a beach in South America? Tierra Santa has you covered (figuratively) there, too.
So my point is, if you have ever read the bible and love gaudy things, then get your ass down to Tierra Santa in Buenos Aires right now and find Jesus (in fiberglass) before your soul burns in Hell for all eternity.
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