Fame is a Hell of a drug. Anyone who has eyes, ears, and internet access knows that the three biggest hot-messes of Hollywood right now are Amanda Bynes, Lindsay Lohan, and Justin Bieber. Yes, I am aware that Lindsay and Amanda don’t actually live in Hollywood, but they might as well for all the bat-shit they are serving America right now. Celebrities acting crazy is nothing new however, and I am left wondering if they are real people, or actual reincarnations of previous Hollywood hot-messes. Here is the breakdown:
Justin Bieber– He hasn’t been on the hot-mess express long, but the train has obviously left the station. Whether he is wearing adult diaper pants, speeding around town high out of his mind in his mirrored chrome Fisker Karma hitting paparazzi, or abandoning his monkey in foreign countries, it is no secret that Justin Bieber is on a slippery slope. Ridiculous clothes? Check. Surrounded by bad influences? Check. Pet Monkey? Check. He is one tube of skin- bleach from becoming Michael Jackson.
Amanda Bynes– I was on her side, and even suggested that she was putting these crazy stunts on purpose, until she came for Jenny McCarthy. Jenny McCarthy is a prime example of a funny girl who kept her shit together. Amanda’s reckless ignorance to the fact that she is acting fucking insane in public is reminiscent of 2008’s bald Britney. I still have hope however, since Britney was able to pull it together 7 years later when her hair finally grew back. Good luck, Amanda.
Lindsay “second chances” Lohan– I think the world has been rooting for Lindsay since day one, but she doesn’t seem to care. She has squandered every chance she gets, and recently made her court-appointed rehab into a joke by trying to bring 270 outfits, and changing her mind several times to suit her addiction to nicotine. Her staggering drug problem, continual abundance of chances, extreme plastic surgery, and inability to get it the fuck together reminds me of Anna Nicole Smith. And we all know how that turned out.