Rant of the Week: Does Fashion Matter When You Are Trying To Stay Warm?

full body sweater
Written by Gary

full body sweater

Winter is finally here, and even though the global warming fairy has kept it kind of mild, I am still wearing Uniqlo heattech thermals underneath all my clothes. There are very few things that I like about winter, but one of them is that people stop caring as much what they look like, because they can’t afford to be picky when they are freezing their tits off. Winter has a way of evening the playing field when it comes to fashion. It doesn’t matter if you are a size 10 or a size zero, when you wear a floor length down comforter jacket with a hood that zips over your face, you pretty much look like everyone else.
If you are an asshole that is overly superficial, you probably wear a skimpy jacket that gives you a severely drafty cooter. People then look at you like an idiot, because if its one thing we value in New York, its comfort (since we have so little of it in our lives).
What is the other benefit to winter fashions making us all look like unshapely lumps of clay? The fact that we can eat whatever we want, until we become unshapely lumps of clay.
When it comes to the winter season, I say: Who needs fashion when you can have food?

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About the author


Gary is the gay guy that every girl wants to be, and every guy wants to be with (Mostly because he can't get pregnant). He is based in Manhattan, but loves traveling to exotic new people, and sleeping with interesting new places. He is an adventurous writer, digital artist, and game designer that will try almost anything if it makes a good story.
--Instagram: @garyadrianrandall --Twitter: @gadrianrandall


  • Gary, I read all of your posts and while you are hilarious mostly all of the time (unless something really serious is going down), you are also extremely insightful. I’m not sure if the picture of the finely knitted junk magnifier gives my comment any credence, but keep up the great work. You rock.

    • Haha! I didn’t even realize that it was a junk magnifier but I see it now. I should buy one for my ex-boyfriend. Thanks for the compliment!!!

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