Sex Spotting: 5 Reasons to sleep with a NerdBy Gary • Feb 21st, 2012 • Category: Advice, SEX AND RELATIONSHIPS, Sex Life, Toys
1. Nerds probably don’t have any STD’s. Its true they may not have had that much practice at actual sex since they spent their time mining coal in the World of Warcraft instead of mining for poon in a woman’s vagina, but being good at sex is not something you are born with. If your nerd puts half the determination into sex as he did into memorizing all the Star Wars movies it won’t be long before you are headed warp speed towards the planet Orgasm.
2. Nerds are kinky. It may not be your kind of kink and you may ask yourself if anyone, even Carrie Fischer could ever really have pulled off braided buns, but at least its more interesting than the sex you have had before. Remember that frat guy you dated that grabbed onto your boobs like he was changing a flat tire on a semi truck?
3. They have good sex toys. What else would someone use a light saber for? The thing lights up for God’s sake. He will find his way to Labia Land in the dark with no problems.
4. They are loyal. The problem with nerds is that they were always too nice to beat the shit out of guys that hassled them, and too smart to ruin their futures for a few petty years of being a “bad boy”. This puts them in the perfect position to make a great partner for a mid 20′s gal who has already had her share of assholes. Nerds appreciate you because they think you are hotter than they deserve.
5. Nerds normally have big dicks. I won’t explain how I know this, but have you ever wondered why all the hot muscled guys you sleep with come equipped with gherkin dicks? They are compensating for something.
The next time you are thinking about inviting someone to go downtown to pound-town consider all that I have said. Then, make the decision to take a nerd home. You can thank me when you are stimulated both mentally and physically, and your vagina resembles the mouth of Mordor.
(Honestly I don’t even know what that is. Instead of actually watching The Lord of the Rings, I slept with him).
Gary is Gary is the gay guy that every girl wants to be, and every guy wants to be with (Mostly because he can't get pregnant). He is based in Manhattan, but loves traveling to exotic new people, and sleeping with interesting new places. He is an adventurous writer, photographer, and web designer that will try almost anything if it makes a good story.
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