Dating SEX AND RELATIONSHIPS Sex Life

I Will Never Touch You.

Written by Bryce

It’s come to my attention that a certain “Donny Papermaker” has been spreading my name all over town… as his girlfriend.

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Let’s clear the air.  First of all, I’m on hiatus from men.  Second, even if I wanted to date… I would NEVER date you.  Aside from your tacky accent, bad bedroom decor, and cheesey wardrobe, you’re just not my type.  So, that being said, this is a public request for you to leave me the eff alone, and to stop photoshopping yourself into all my pics.

About the author

Bryce

Bryce Gruber is a Manhattanite mom who can be found jet-setting off to every corner of the globe. She loves exotic places, planes with WiFi, summer clothes, & Sucre brown butter truffles. Bryce's aim is to do to luxury what Elton John did to being gay. Follow her on twitter @brycegruber

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