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Archives for the ‘Toys’ Category

Five Penis Pumpkins

TweetPenis pumpkins are the perfect way to be inappropriate on Halloween. I actually won our pumpkin carving contest last year [...]

Penis pumpkins are the perfect way to be inappropriate on Halloween. I actually won our pumpkin carving contest last year with this veiny masterpiece. Follow me on Instagram @Gadrianrandall if you want to see what kind of dick I carve this year (hint: it will be black). Pumpkin carving is an age old tradition leading back to the days when people actually had to use candles for light, instead of j... More...


By • Oct 28th, 2014 • Category: SEX AND RELATIONSHIPS, Toys


Men Who Like to Live as Rubber Dolls

TweetAdam Ramos makes his living creating female rubber doll suits for cross-dressing men. Yet again, the Internet has made me [...]

Adam Ramos makes his living creating female rubber doll suits for cross-dressing men. Yet again, the Internet has made me proud to be from Florida. For those of you who aren’t grown-ass men with rubber tits, “rubber dolling” is the process by which men don rubber body suits to make them look like a female (a female made of plastic that is, so basically Renee Zellweger). Adam Ramos and his moth... More...


By • Oct 21st, 2014 • Category: SEX AND RELATIONSHIPS, Toys



The Super Creepy Hugging Chair

TweetIf you are feeling lonely, buy a creepy hugging chair from Japan. I’m not really much of a hugger. In [...]

If you are feeling lonely, buy a creepy hugging chair from Japan. I’m not really much of a hugger. In fact, my friends have told me that my hugs resemble the cold touch of one of Death’s skeleton fingers, clasping onto their shoulders on a cold autumn night. I am also a one-hugger, putting as much effort into my hugs as I do early morning hand jobs. I keep it this way, because I don’t actually unde... More...


By • Oct 12th, 2014 • Category: SEX AND RELATIONSHIPS, Toys


Woman Makes Life-Like Dolls With Her Children’s Hair

TweetMarilyn Mansfield has over 300 dolls, including one that was made with her son’s hair. In fucking creepy news, New [...]

Marilyn Mansfield has over 300 dolls, including one that was made with her son’s hair. In fucking creepy news, New York-based doll-maker Marilyn Mansfield is so obsessed with dolls that she treats them like actual babies, walks them around in strollers, and has used her son’s hair to make one of them feel more like family. It should be mentioned that that doll’s name is Davina Star, her husb... More...


By • Sep 9th, 2014 • Category: FAMILY, Toys


Make-out Pillows for Your Preteen Nephew

TweetMy first kiss was with a neighborhood girl named Becky. We were playing spin the bottle, and it happened pretty [...]

My first kiss was with a neighborhood girl named Becky. We were playing spin the bottle, and it happened pretty randomly. I then tried to get her to play it every time she came over, and even made up new rules to the game to take things a little further. Needless to say she was not interested. In retrospect, she looked like a lemur after an uncut Colombian 8-ball anyway. If these make out pillows had ... More...


By • Feb 18th, 2014 • Category: SEX AND RELATIONSHIPS, Toys


WTF: 10 Creepy But Cute Fantasy Creature Dolls

TweetWe’ve been talking a lot about toys around here lately, but unlike the other varieties these toys don’t vibrate, and [...]

We’ve been talking a lot about toys around here lately, but unlike the other varieties these toys don’t vibrate, and probably won’t make your man feel emasculated. Made by  23-year-old Russian artist Santani, the fantasy creature dolls are created to look as cute and otherworldly as possible, and possibly remind you of the gremlin-infested nightmares of your youth. Seriously, I wa... More...


By • Jan 22nd, 2014 • Category: Art, Toys


5 Strange Futuristic Sex Toys You Have Never Heard of

TweetThe Adult Entertainment Expo in Las Vegas is a wonderland of new sexual inventions, and a chance to meet the [...]

The Adult Entertainment Expo in Las Vegas is a wonderland of new sexual inventions, and a chance to meet the people you masturbate to on the regular basis, in the flesh. It is also a great place to find out what new sex toys are out on the market, in case your married sex life has become as dry as your grandmother’s cooch. Here are a few random sex toys that you may never have heard of. Welcome to t... More...


By • Jan 21st, 2014 • Category: SEX AND RELATIONSHIPS, Toys


Cat Battle Armor. That is All

TweetCat battle armor; because your pussy should be able to defend itself. In utterly amazing things found on Etsy news, [...]

Cat battle armor; because your pussy should be able to defend itself. In utterly amazing things found on Etsy news, this cat battle armor is hand-crafted and one of a kind, made of leather, waxed cord, and elastic. It only ships within the United States, but who cares about foreign pussies when we have so many of our own, right here in America. I am sure you take very good care of your cherished cat,... More...


By • Jan 12th, 2014 • Category: HEALTH, Toys


ReinDog Season Begins: Top Seven Reindeer Dogs Online

TweetSarah Mclachlan would turn over in her grave if she could see this. Wait- she’s not dead? My bad. In [...]

Sarah Mclachlan would turn over in her grave if she could see this. Wait- she’s not dead? My bad. In creative ways to abuse your pets news, Reindog Season is upon us. For those of you who don’t know what this is, it means that pet owners everywhere are going to start dressing their pooches up like reindeer and parading them around trying to create the perfect Instagram. They even have... More...


By • Nov 27th, 2013 • Category: FASHION, Toys


Your iPhone is Naked Without a Pair of Panties

TweetYour panties act as a barrier of protection for your vagina against foreign bodies (especially French ones). Panties protect your [...]

Your panties act as a barrier of protection for your vagina against foreign bodies (especially French ones). Panties protect your most valuable parts from the outside world and come in a variety of fashionable colors and patterns to please the eye. You extend this courtesy of panty protection without even thinking, and yet the truth is that your vagina probably isn’t even worth as much as the ... More...


By • Nov 12th, 2013 • Category: SHINFO, Toys